Showing posts with label sensation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sensation. Show all posts

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Sensasi Debutan


Kemarin sore, sekitar pukul 16-an gitu, mendadak telepon seluler yang kugeletakkan di sebelah komputer berbunyi. Eh, sebenarnya ga beneran berbunyi deng, hanya kedap kedip doang sih layarnya, soalnya lagi moda sunyi (silent mode). Pas kulirik, oh, ternyata panggilan dari salah satu kakakku, June.

Barulah otakku mulai bereaksi memproses kejadian tersebut. Jam 4 sore. Telpon dari saudara kandung. Jauh di seberang. Artinya ...?? Degg!!

Mendadak jantung ini berdegup sedikit lebih cepat. Ada apa ya, koq menelpon sore-sore?? Sempat parno ga mau jawab, takut mendengar kabar buruk. Yah, biasanya kan telpon-telponan dengan saudara begini kalau hanya untuk saling bertukar kabar terbaru, cenderung dilakukan saat-saat larut malam atau akhir pekan. Katanya sih, karena tarifnya bisa lebih murah. Entah benar entah tidak, mungkin ada yang bisa bantu mencerahkan?

Anyway, kembali ke cerita awal.
Masih diliputi sedikit perasaan was-was, kutekan tombol ‘Answer’ dan setengah bergumam menyapa, “Halo?” (menyamarkan intonasi biar kesannya cool and calm)

Untung saja saudara-saudari, saat itu bukan kabar buruk yang hendak disampaikan oleh June. Ternyata dia cuma mau menginformasikan, bahwa untuk Pemilu Presiden bulan Juli mendatang, namaku kali ini masuk dalam Daftar Pemilih Tetap. Tidak seperti dalam Pemilu Legislatif bulan April lalu, dimana tak seorang pun anggota keluarga besarku yang tercatat dalam daftar sialan itu. Istilah lebih kerennya, kami semua “digolputkan”!

Wah wah, ini sejarah!
Karena kalau tidak salah ingat, barulah untuk pertama kalinya dalam satu dekade plus plus setelah melewati batas usia minimal untuk dinyatakan sah menjadi pemilih dalam pemilu, namaku tercatat di dalam Daftar Pemilih!

Andai saja aku berada di sana, bisa jadi lembaran kertas Daftar Pemilih Tetap yang memajang namaku akan kusobek dari papan pengumuman di kantor RT (atau RW?) dan kubawa pulang lalu kukoleksi hingga kertasnya menguning (talking about systemic vandalism). Sama seperti lembar kertas pengumuman kelulusan Ujian Masuk Perguruan Tinggi yang memuat namaku dulu, masih tersimpan di salah satu plastic container – entah yang mana – di pojokan kamar.

Karena selama ini, agar saudara-saudari ketahui, pemungutan suara yang pernah kuikuti – bahkan pernah menjadi salah satu panitia pelaksananya, lho! – hanyalah untuk memilih ketua kelas, ketua OSIS, dan ketua angkatan saat kuliah dulu.

Mendebarkan ...
Aku akan menjadi pemilih pemula, meskipun usiaku tak lagi belia, walau sebenarnya masih muda (teteup ...).
Jadi pengen tahu, mungkinkah begini rasanya sensasi merasa punya power buat menentukan masa depan bangsa ini?


Monday, October 29, 2007

The Curious Incidents When Innocence Lost and Consciousness Regained in One Certain Weekend



Just look what you’ve done. You made a fool of everyone.
It seemed like such fun until you lose what you had won ...
(Jet, Look What You’ve Done)



You asked me what was the matter. ..

You left me without any healthy-logical option for keeping my own sanity other than to leave you temporarily, that’s what happened.

I allocated half of my time for you, instead you demanded me to sacrifice more, if not all.

You told me you need a friend who can fully understand.
I said you need someone who can accompany you in your extremely oscillating emotional roller-coaster ride.

You accused me of abandoning you in such mental wreckage, but you should have seen it coming by risking our friendship on the very first place for a very brief time of fun and sensation, and it was only on your side.

You asked me with tears streamed down your cheeks, why was I being so cruel to you, but you failed to see it from my point of view, that you’ve changed into a stranger I barely knew, someone whose mouth spoke of “a version of the truth” but the eyes sparkled with signs of obvious lies.

Once I took all your words for granted, but after that night in the club and the course of events that followed in that certain weekend, everything that came from you were viewed as nothing more but deceits.

Even though I reasoned this decision on the sake of my own emotional stability and my soul tranquility, it was hard for me to convey this plan to distance myself from you.

Nevertheless, I thanked you much for all the attention and time and help you had given me.

Until the better time comes for both of us to fix the damaged friendship, and for you to return back to the one personality I once familiar and felt comfortable to mingle with, I must ask you to find help from somebody other than me (much better from professionals).

And because I believe that my very presence around your life would contribute nothing to improve this unprecedented awkward condition between us, yet on the contrary will only deteriorate things furthermore, I must bid you a momentarily farewell ...

So goodbye for now, and good luck with your life.



{ Original version of The Curious Incidents When Innocence Lost and Consciousness Regained in One Certain Weekend was posted online in my now defunct Friendster's blog under the title of The Case of The Ex on December 9th, 2005 }